It's Monday Again... (November 8, 2010)

EMERGENCY: Every Monday morning a group of men meet in the building next door to our office. Every Monday, one of the men parks his big ol fat SUV: 75% in one parking spot and 25% in my parking spot making it IMPOSSIBLE for me to park. Needless to say, this is incredibly annoying and after brain-storming a resolution for the past 12 minutes, I think I’ve come up with the only logical solution. Next Sunday I’m going to load my bike into my car. I will park my car: 75% in my parking spot and 25% in his. I will then proceed to ride my bike home, securing my spot. I’m pretty sure that if Jesus were here, that’s probably what He would do too.

I don’t ACTUALLY have a bike. However, I would really enjoy one. I humbly suggest you buy me a light pink or yellow bike with a basket on it and drop it off to me this weekend in honor of my half birthday. If it had sparkly handle bars, that would just be a bonus.

My half birthday isn’t actually until January but I don’t feel that this should in any way interfer with my plans.

My new co-worker talks a lot. I’m pretty sure it must be her spiritual gift. Most of the time, I tune it out for fear that my brain will explode but I realized today that it may be a gift from God to use for my blog. So I now keep a note-book with me at all times and jot down all the crazy things she says. Please note that all of these quotes come completely out of nowhere with absolutely no encouragement on my part.

• 9:02am: “My husband bought me really nice kitchen knives for Christmas 3 years ago. Every time one of us uses them we slice one of our fingers, so last Tuesday I told him he had to put them up. We don’t eat anything anymore that we can’t cut with a butter knife. It’s just not worth risking our safety.”
• 11:53am: *as she pulls a cone-shaped cup from the water machine* “This is just so I can hear the martains better.” *holds cone-shaped cup to her ear, then proceeds to fill it with water*

I moved with my grown-ups into a new community this weekend. Everyone in the neighborhood drives by very slow and even, at times, roll down their windows to look at us when we are outside. People tell me they are just kind of nosy but I’m 82.3% sure it’s because I’m breathtakingly attractive.

Have a beautiful Monday.

That is all.